I love fireworks...but I've never had one explode in my face and blind an eye. I'm sure I'd feel as you do had this happened. I remember the draft/lottery...The boy next door was called up. Came home but returned 'different.' Horrid war. I was more fortunate than you - no friends died over there. But a friend's son died in Afghanistan. Then she died of cancer two years later - you'll never convince me her grief didn't lead to the cancer. She was a war casualty every bit as much as her son was.