Well, girlfriend, I had to go to the garden and ponder before commenting - so many thoughts rushed thru me, reading your letter.

First, I lived your life. The mother urging me to marry the bucks, marrying money - having the large house (actually, I had three and I say this not to one-up you but to help explain that MORE stuff never helps.) My Ex (yes, he's an Ex husband but current good friend) also was married to his career. I actually have a Father's Day card my daughter sent ME this year, saying, "Let's get real...you raised us" And she's not estranged from her father at all. It's simply a statement of how things were.

Like you, I was also deeply unhappy. I can remember driving home from the mall and thinking, It's not so bad. I have a Mercedes, I bought a Vuitton.

But no car and no purse can fill the hole in our soul and heart.

Your journey ahead is beckoning. Your heart is urging you to make changes.

I have so much more to say but, for now, simply surrender. Surrender to the Universe, God, karma, Source, knowledge, enlightenment. Whatever you are comfortable calling it. Ask IT to show you a sign.

Then kick back and trust the process. Force nothing or you may see signs where there aren't.

When it's time, you'll know your first step.